Every Day You’re Killing Yourself

You may not acknowledge it.

You may ignore it.

You may refuse to accept it.

You Are . . . .

Because you let them do it to you . . . .

The excuses:

• I’d rather have peace than say anything

• It’s not worth it

• I need my job to pay my bills

• So what?

• Like water off a duck’s back

• I rise above all that

• Karma will take care of it.  Mine is good; theirs isn’t.

• Who cares?

You care.  Whether you acknowledge it or not, you care. And when someone takes a “bite” out of you, the bite hurts one way or another.  You’ll pay the price no matter the excuse for not taking action.

Sticks and stones may break my bones but words won’t hurt me – it all hurts.  Decades later people still reel from being ridiculed, pushed around, ignored, laughed at, ignored, called names, beaten up, teased . . . .

Was it your fault?

Perhaps.

If you didn’t have the skills to deal with the situation or the support and guidance to learn how, then the fault lies in the adults who likely didn’t have the skills to stand up for themselves and couldn’t teach you.  They helped you with the excuses.  It wasn’t your fault then.

But, as an adult, the fault lies squarely with you because you can do better if you want to.

Bullying kills you – every day – at work, at home, in the community – everywhere if you don’t learn the skills to stop it. 

Your psyche is damaged.  You feel defective, weak and less than.

When your psyche is under siege, your body reacts causing the body not to work as it should.

Psychologically, depression can set in or, at the very least, you avoid people at all costs as you have come to believe pain is everywhere when you’re with people.

You pay a very dear price for not standing up for yourself everywhere you are. 

Every time someone bullies you and you do nothing about it, you kill yourself little by little – every time.  You diminish yourself in your own eyes and the chemical reactions within your body are killing you.  Your psyche dies a little bit more every time.  Your soul is attacked. 

Think about it.

Feel the pain.

What can you do about it?  Plenty.

I’ll be creating posts over the next while about bullying.  For those who have the courage to stop being bullied, stay tuned.  I’ll be talking about techniques to deal with bullying effectively in different types of situations.  However, you must have the courage and be willing to practice.  When bullying happens, it occurs without notice.  You must be ready. 

Do you want to stop killing yourself?

Lorraine Arams
On Contract Only

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